Schuld, Sühne, Scheinheiligkeit, Erlösung
Guilt, atonement, hypocrisy, redemption

Eine meiner frühesten Erinnerungen an den katholischen Religionsunterricht der ersten Klasse war folgender Satz unseres Priesters: «Während des Duschens ist es uns nicht erlaubt, uns anzusehen oder anzufassen. Dies ist eine Sünde.» Ich war sieben Jahre alt und hatte keine Ahnung wovon er sprach. Erst Jahre später verstand ich, dass er sich auf sexuelle Handlungen bezog. Ich stand also in der Dusche und hatte keine Ahnung, wie ich mich ohne «Ansehen» und noch schlimmer ohne «Anfassen» waschen soll. Es ging nicht. Ich musste mich mit dem Waschlappen und der Seife anfassen. Nicht in sexueller, sondern rein praktischer Weise. Von diesem Tag an war mein täglicher Duschgang eine quälende Sünde für mich.

One of my earliest memories of the first grade catholic religion class was the following sentence from our priest: «We are not allowed to look at or touch us while showering. This is a sin.» I was seven years old and I had no idea what he was talking about. It wasn’t until years later that sex or masturbation came to mind in this context. So I stood in the shower and had no idea how to wash myself without «looking» and, even worse, without «touching». It did not work. I had to touch myself with the washcloth and the soap. Not in a sexual but purely practical way. From that day on, my daily shower was an agonizing sin to me.

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen.

The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

© Nicole Widmer Meyer «Salvation», Mixed Media, 2021